Im dealing with a patient

patient faking seizure in ER

Back to the grind!

After a long hiatus from ER work, I'm headed back to work next week. What a surprise! I got a call just last week for an interview after throwing an application in for what looks like a perfect job for me... PRN work! That means I don't get any benefits, but I don't have a set schedule and only HAVE TO work 8 hours a month minimum! It's exactly what I have been looking for and never expected to find! It gives me the freedom to still be a stay-at-home mom, but pick up shifts in the middle of the night when I don't sleep anyhow and everyone else is home and sleeping. I get to keep my skills up and keep learning...

I can't wait to see this fun stuff again!

Upkeep...

Blogging is better than going to a therapist, right? But not as good as going to your colorist. You get to gossip there, as well as look good...

Alright, so I haven't been so good at this blogging thing as I thought I would be. I swear, I have the best intentions - and so much planned. Tomorrow... just let me get through today first... let me grow my roots out a little bit.

Addicted to tutus...

I think I love making tutus.  I actually ignored my older children arguing today and just kept on making my tutu for Lexi... it was somewhat therapeutic.  Tomorrow comes PURPLE and longer... maybe some fancy finishes on the bottom.  We'll see.  Anyhow.  I seriously am addicted.  Who'da thunk?  Now I'm picturing buying Lexi zebra print leggings to go with a black top and a hot pink medium length tutu... and maybe some hot pink patent leather combat boots, lol.

Anyhow.  Lazy day since I was focused on the new tutu and shirt.  I made a roast on the stovetop.  Cast iron (ceramic glazed) dutch oven, of course.  I have no idea what cut of meat.  I could care less.  It really doesn't matter to me.  I got a 2-for-1 deal at the grocery store, so one went in the pot and one went in the freezer.  It's all in the sauce anyhow.  I made homemade mashed potatoes to go with the gravy, and steamed some green beans.  Sourdough rolls, and voila!

Here's the million dollar recipe folks... it's the bomb!

Whiney Java Roast

• 3-6 pound roast, any cut (boneless) 
  
• 1 cup flour, salt/pepper/dried thyme
• 4 cloves garlic -- peeled and chopped
  
• 2 large onions, roughly chopped
• 3 Tbsp olive oil
• 1 1/2 cups good quality red wine (I like Shiraz)
• 1 large can V-8® vegetable juice
• 10 oz very strong black coffee
• 
  
  1 cup beef stock
  
  
  
• 1 large bunch fresh thyme, removed from stalks
• 2 bay leaves
• salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 
  
  6 T butter
  
  
  
• 6 T flour
• 1 cup heavy cream

Heat dutch oven on stovetop with olive oil.  Mix flour, salt/pepper/dried thyme in shallow dish on countertop. 

1. Unwrap roast and stare at it in dismay.  HOLY CRAP that's a lotta beef!  Unless you're a vegetarian, deal with it.  Grab it with your hands and coat in in the flour mixture.  If you don't feel like making a mess, use a leftover produce bag from the grocery store to put the flour mixture in... throw in the beef, and wallop one of your whiney kids with it.
2. Brown the roast on all sides.  Add onion and garlic to pan if you can see after chopping those monster onions.  I had mascara all over my sleeves.  Cook for about 5-10 minutes, but DO NOT LET GARLIC BROWN.
3. Take that bitch of a roast out carefully.  Whine to your husband that you're not strong enough and let him burn himself with the scalding oil.  Set in on the cutting board that I know you haven't cleaned up yet.
4. Pour in the red wine.  Scrape up all the brown bits off the bottom.  Reduce by half.  Drink a glass of the Shiraz.  It's good. 
5. Add the V8, Coffee, and stock.  Whine to your husband again about the "heavy roast" and get it back in there somehow.  Add the bay leaves. 
6. Get that sucker boiling, reduce it to low immediately and cover it.
7. Drink some more wine and ignore that roast for a few hours.  At least 3.  You can move it to a crock pot if you want and run away to the nearest mall too.
8. If you must, you can put vegetables in your roast, but that's gross.  Put them in the oven where they belong.  Don't screw up my gravy.
9. When you're ready to eat, set the roast on a carving board and let it rest for 15 min.
10. Pour the liquids into a large bowl with a pouring spout.
11. Throw the butter into the dutch oven.  Yell at someone to throw the rolls in the oven because you're busy.  When the butter is melted, add the flour.  Whisk for two minutes or more if you feel special.
12. Add the liquids back in.  When it thickens, add the cream.  Bring to a boil, reduce to low-med, and simmer for five minutes or so.  Voila.  If you want it thicker... use more fat/flour dummy! 
13. I like to slice  my roast (if it doesn't just fall apart) and add it back to the gravy.  If anyone whines... thump 'em.

Soup and Salad

Just hits the spot after a bad day...

• 1 large yellow onion diced
• 4 carrots, diced
• 4 stalks celery, diced
• 6 tablespoons butter
• fresh thyme/sage/parsley
• salt/pepper
• 1 lb mild (or spicy if you prefer) italian sausage
• 2 large sweet potatoes, cubed
• 4 large russet potatoes, cubed
• 4-6 cups chicken stock
• 1 bag baby spinach
• 1 qt heavy cream
• 1 cup parmesan, grated

1. In dutch oven, cook ingredients through fresh herbs until softened but not browned.
2. In separate pan, brown italian sausage.
3. Add potatoes and italian sausage to dutch oven once vegetables are soft.
4. Add chicken stock, bring to boil, reduce heat, cover, and simmer for 30 minutes.
5. Add spinach and heavy cream, simmer uncovered for additional 20-30 minutes.  Add parmesan, stir thoroughly, serve immediately.  If you like your potatoes more "substantial", add with heavy cream and simmer until potatoes are cooked through.

We serve ours with a huge green salad.  Lots of veggies... cucumbers, black olives, carrots, cherry tomatoes, avocados, red peppers, etc.  I had a friend ask me the other day how the hell to slice a pepper, so here goes.

1.  Find the flattest side and lay the pepper on that side please.  Cut off the "top".

2.  Your pepper will look like this now.  Cut along each side of the "rib". 

3.  You will be left with only the sweet parts of the pepper, no seeds, and no bitter ribs!

We also like to make homemade croutons.  You can either make homemade bread or use storebought. 

Our favorite storebought is the Hawaiian Round.  Cut into rough squares, approximately two inches. 

Toss with a good olive oil, kosher salt, and coarse black pepper.  That's it. 

Roast in the oven for an hour and a half at 275, turning once or twice.

Katybug

So... today was my only neice's first birthday party and I managed to miss it.  I mean, this crap can only happen to me.  Seriously.  The party was at 4pm.  Easy enough to make, right?  I wake up at 7am in a panic.  I haven't finished a present yet.  I don't BUY presents, I make presents.  I don't like giving something to my Kate and Will that they can get from someone else.  Not cool.  Here's what I did for Christmas (of course on the 24th... )  I made Kate a cute decoupaged container full of handmade nonslip hair bows.  Here she is wearing them all at once...

And here's Will's present.  He is in a HUGE Star Wars stage of his life.  I made him a stool... we called it a "Thinking Stool", and told him that whenever he needed to think about something, to sit on it and he would become wise like YODA! 

I was supposed to be working on a rocking chair that my sister-in-law had as a young child, redoing it for Kate.  I was going to rework it based on the letters and artwork I did for Kate's nursery.  Here's a shot of her letters, I'll post better ones later when I get them from Gret.

<----original picture (katybug in crib)

Ok, so anyhow... Gret's computerwas down and she ccould't get me a closeup of the letters or artwork for me to finish the rocking chair.  I ccouldn't see enough in the original picture to get the patterns in the crib either.  So I wake up in a cold sweat this morning and haul ass to Joann Fabrics and Old Navy at 8am to buy supplies to make a handmade tutu and decorate a onesie for my Katybug.  I think it'll be adorable, and besides, how long can it take to put some tulle on a piece of elastic, right?  I scanned the internet, they said maybe 2 yards of tulle for a baby tutu.  Sure, no problem.  I bought about 100 yards because I thought I would make a few for Lexi later.  Thank god for that. 

First of all... this is no easy feat in the dry air.  Figure out how to cut a million strips of tulle when they're on a spool and each strip sticks to your furry sweater.  Doesn't help that my cotton candy pink sweater is the same color as the tulle.  I also decided to cut the ends of the FOLDED tulle in a decorative manner.  Lord help us.  Now I have a zillion triangles of tulle stuck to my jeans, my socks, the carpet, and the cats.  Shit...

Now how to figure out how to attach these bastards to the elastic... oh crap!  Why didn't I do this sooner??? And how big is a one-year old's waist anyhow?  Oh jeez... where is the valium when you need it?  Lexi is trying to help, and suddenly I have a fruit snack stuck in a pile of tulle.  Remove gummy snack and throw away four strips.  Wipe brow, remove toddler, put on Veggie Tales movie, sing along with Larry the Cucumber, lather, rinse, repeat.

I see I have one hour to finish the project, take a shower, wake Lexi from a nap, and pack the car.  I can do it.  I shorten the waist, finish up, take a shower, rip the tag off the new jeans I bought from Old Navy so I wouldn't have to do laundry before the party, and wake Lexi up with ten minutes to spare.  I rock!!!

Just then I hear Matthew yelling, "SCOOBY!!! NOOOOOO!!!"  I run into the living room just in time to see the dog upchucking some unknown substance all over the living room floor, but not in time to stop Lexi from running right into the first pile... in her party clothes.  She slides from one pile into the next on one foot... sigh. 

Throw toddler into bath, find other party clothes, clean up dog vomit, laugh at preteen gagging on couch.  We're now 45 minutes late.  Run like hell into car, get on tollway, realize we don't have the address, GPS, or directions.  Can't get a hold of anyone, turn back around, go home to podunk, print off address/directions, get back in car and head off again.  Look at clock, realize we won't make it to party until 30 minutes before end of the party.  Pfffft.  I quit.  I drop Katybug's gift off at my parent's house and head home to wash the rugs and make soup.